HOW's LIFE ?

HOW's LIFE ?
Not so great.. Well, preparing for Olvls. What do i expect?
But before i can really go on. I really need to something once and for all.
So tht when its cleared, my mind and heart will also be so.

In the month of august until now. So many things happened after I turned 17.
Ha, I just dont knw where to start or end.

But of cos there are certain things I wanna highlight. So as to make my life and your life better.

I "quit" smoking. OK... rarely had a stick unless real constipation or temptation or frustration.
I knw, its really bad for health and Im trying my very best to just kick tht bad habbit and stay healthy.

I decided dont wanna enter a polythenic anymore. I find no point going into anyone and studying a course tht i will never like. Its a total waste of time. Im thinking of gg join art school to study ID. Non of you knw how much i want this course as my future career. I want it alot. Either this path tht my daddy set for me, or Im not gg to survive in the society with my fcuked up attitude.

I knw for my olvl, Im not gg to do well at all. Cos the time i devote into my studies.. gr.. you can count with ur ten fingers. 6 weeks is all im left with. I PROMISED I WILL DO THE BEST I CAN. LOL, i promised so many people to do well. But i always end up spending time thinking about stuff tht are useless. I admit Im useless now. 0.0 people who hate me can clap for me, people doted me can cry for me now.

For many times, I maybe the one in the wrong, for sending wrong kindda signals to certain friends, some really good friends. Maybe sometimes too good tht they wonder off. Its just so many times, ive been in this kindda situation. I seriously went to think about it through... How apologetic and bad I felt, I just dont knw how to tell you guys. I treat goodfriends unisex-ly, (sorry for my broken vocab) but you get what i mean. I love to make new friends, everybody knws. And from last year until now, Im bowing down my head and really say to these friends, tht Im stupid tht I didnt see the the MAN in you guys(MRZDJS). JUST STUPID. but i didnt regret neither am i ever gg to regret.

To my only bro, its really sick to see u sad and hurt. Im sure I wont want you to contact me for the time. Let my temper cool off, and yours too. I'll trust you, but I have no idea how to trust her. Dont cry anm.

My mum is unhappy with me, when i told her i dont wanna go poly anymore. Everyday shitting me with the same old shitty words. Im useless.. always.. Sorry tht you have to spend even more money on the useless me for the next 4 years to really get what i want. Dont worry, i will find part time to minimize your burden.

Daddy, still wants me to go into ITE. I enjoy having dinner with him. Although his words are always repeating.
He will say: "you have to be hardworking inorder to be a boss" "hands-on stuff are always better then paper&ink work."
"you go become a ID or a FD come out to work with papa" "dont be afraid of hardship, must PIA!" Always ending with "really papa will never bluff you." aww.. love tht.

In my lower sec life, I always tell myself if im gg to fail olvl, "im sure to jump off from my building"
(ya right, I was stay on the 4th storey then.) NOW i didnt say it because im staying on the 10th.)


My sis, always been there to wipe my tears at night before bed. For the only species left in my life tht care.
well, my bro have to help himself in studies man.. and he's a noise pollutant for sure, its his profession.


My awesomes, are going through a chemistry process called "cracking". HAHAHA. Im sure we'll be fine again soon :)


Complaining is my nature. Sarcasm is my style of living. My forever-so-mean words and actions are always choking your anger to the brim. Im sorry, Barney. But I personally dont not think tht I can control myself from loving you. I've loved you too much. Tht Im still trying to accept and adapt to the life you are giving me. Its so hilarious to me, so much tht i will laugh when i daydream. I can totally ignore tht girl, *laughing at myself. Just sometimes, idk.. because of you, Im just totally not jazzmine anymore. My friends are all shocked, shock until cannot. Im shock too, shock until cannot. Im sad, frustrating, angry, soft, shy, happy and mad. When all i want its peace.

You dont want me to step into ur privacy, I wont. You'll live ur life & I will live mine, as usual.
Im very sure im gg to hate the rest of the month and days ignoring you.
Just until you decide to tell me and confirm with me how much you love me. Im leaving you alone, as usual.


Good night all. goanna PK with my mum again! * DINGDING!

CIAO.